"Listen to me you little upstart, I am not having some snot nosed little rookie tell me where I can and can't work!"

"I'm sorry you feel that way Sir but it's in the constitution, the simple fact is more people believe in me than you these days, which gives me seniority..."

Boreas glared at the teenager sat behind his pine-effect desk with his ultra thin laptop and wanted to give him a clout around the head he wouldn't forget in a hurry.

His mind wandered to the good old days before he had to moonlight as a packer for Ben & Jerry's, when his powers were strong and this little whippersnapper would have been nothing but a snowman by the time he'd finished with him... and, he told himself, he'd have found the biggest possible carrot and shoved it right up....

"Are you listening to me?!"

"What?" Boreas snapped out of his memories. "What did you say?"

"I said, no more unauthorised trips," replied the arrogant teen deity from his executive computer chair with faux leather finish. "Snow in February in ENGLAND?! That's well outside your operational boundaries and created friction."

"Do you know who I am you little shit? I'm Boreas, I'm the God of Winter and I was giving people cold weather before you were a tent in your daddy's jockstrap..."

"...and that was a long time ago Old Man, when things were disorganised chaos! You dropped 4 inches of snow in some places but without any requisition forms, clearance, cloud cover control guidance..."

"Four inches? You think I need paperwork for that? Back in my day you saw a human you wanted to give a good 12 inches to and you just went in and..."

"...and created havoc, it's that kind of attitude that's got us into a mess already, have you seen Zeus' monthly bill for child support?"

"So if I want to give people a flurry of unique handmade flakes, the sight of snow on a rose, the irreplaceable feeling of crisp white snow that crunches beneath your feet..."

"You fill out a F5402 in triplicate and hand it in 14 weeks before the planned weather, confirming that it is allowable under conditions 1 through 924."

"But..."

"No buts, this is how it's happening, good day."

Boreas thought about starting a row but gave up, standing up and storming out of the room, ignoring the spotty faced teen deity in his White Sabbath Tshirt.

He slammed the door and leant against the wall opposite it, glaring at the golden lettering.

Doleus - God of Global Warming.

Bloody mortals... one day they'd come up with something useful...